Am I haunted? If so by what?

It started last week, coming home from the visit to the house of Abe Lincoln. Now a museum. I have this ditch in the back yard. And I see figures in it. I was afraid it might hurt us. I called the police, they didn't find anything. They put this one device that told you if anyone was moving in there. Than they put lazers around it. They had cameras on the trees and than they said the camera saw nothing but the device that found people did, it was at a really high level of coldness. No lazers went off or anything. Than in the house, when I sleep, I keep hearing pounding on the floor. I live with my wife, she usually is in bed or at work. And she was at her army training the whole week. I keep waking up to find footprints of red paint or something going to my room and just stop right in the middle of the floor. That only happened 2 times. And smoke came from nowhere one day. Like one puff just puffed into my face. And in bed one night, I woke up and felt this really heavy thing on my chest. I couldn't move or breath at all. I just seen this red fur. I just ped back to sleep and woke up in the morning than it was gone. Sometimes I wake up and my TV is turned a different direction. And I have this old toy and I went to the basement and it was on. It was this one light up box that made a picture. And it showed a picture of nothing but it was on. Just a messed up picture. I also keep hearing voices and doors slamming shut hard. I called the police again one time and they ran out of the house scared as hell. I don't know what it was. I went in with my bravery. And I ignored it. Nothing was there. Except a balloon I never seen before. I poped it and threw it away. I am scared. It is still going on. Heck, just last night I seen this shadow run across the wall that didn't look like mine at all and I wasn't running. Than it got to the corner of the wall and it disappeared. It looked like it was half way off the wall. My pasture said that I have a great case of something terribly sensible. He also said it could be Satan haunting me. I also fear I might die, I find knives setting on counters sometimes. I once woke up and found a pitch black person looking down at me on my bed. It was late at night. Of coarse I screamed. It disappeared when I was so afraid I was going to punch it in the face.